Before We Find the Words

I can turn prayer into one more thing I’m behind on. I should have started earlier. I should be less distracted. Surely, by now, I should be better at sitting quietly with God without remembering an email I forgot to answer.

Then this Sunday’s reading from the Wisdom of Solomon gives us a lovely image: someone rises early to seek Wisdom and finds her already sitting at the gate.

I imagine arriving slightly out of breath, with an explanation ready, only to discover that she isn’t asking for one.

We spend a lot of time preparing to be the people we think God would like to meet. We’ll pray when we can concentrate. We’ll come back to church when we feel less awkward. We’ll ask for help once we can explain what’s wrong without crying.

Meanwhile, there is Wisdom, sitting at the gate.

The passage describes her going out to seek people, meeting them along their paths. There is something tender about being sought when we thought finding God was entirely our responsibility.

Perhaps we can set down the explanation for a moment. We can bring the distracted mind, the awkwardness, the tears. Whatever we have been waiting to sort out may take a while yet.

We can pray before it’s sorted.

Even if all we manage today is, “Well, here I am.”